One leg at a time

  This will be a "wee" post, as I'm dashing about trying to balance my prayer, dishes and all other sundry parts of my life!  However, I made a momentous discovery last week that I simply must put in this blog for future generations.  Here goes.

      When I am irritated by something my spouse continually does, I can change the situation.  There it is.  In black and white (or gold and brown if you want to get technical).  

     The specifics.  Between my husband's dresser and the wall there is just enough floor space to accommodate any number of clothes that could also be accommodated in the laundry hamper of hangers/drawers all within a few inches of the aforementioned floor space.  I am not an obsessive compulsive personality. However, I like the floor in my bedroom as neat as possible (particularly since our bedroom completely opens onto the living-room, our unfinished house not having the French doors up that would divide one from the other). Here is where my discovery happened.  For the past years I have been grumbling, sometimes at a level that can be heard, bending over, picking up the clothing and putting them wherever seemed best that WASN'T the floor.  Last week I had a flash of insight and realized I was going about this all the wrong way.  

    My husband's choice in this matter has NOTHING to do with wanting to create work for me.  He is not TRYING to mess up our bedroom.  He simply doesn't think about it at all.  I have spoken, grumbled, whined, complained, and thrown things (not breakable) in an attempt to modify his behavior.  So...I went for the gold and decided to modify my own.

    For over a week, I have done what I wanted to with his clothing. It has cost me less than my previous method of dealing with the "problem" because my negative emotions aren't involved.  It has cost my husband nothing but having to do a little less work to find his pants.  (The hook in the closet is more easily accessible than the floor!)  I resent him less, and that's good all around.  

    There are many who would call this codependent behavior.  I am to the point of almost violently disagreeing.  My husband is not sinning by not thinking about how the room looks when his work trousers are lying in a heap by the dresser.  His work trousers represent so much that he contributes to our family.  His behavior costs me approximately 5 seconds of work...something I can afford and realized I would be selfish to begrudge him.

   So there you have it.  I am choosing to pick up after him for my own pleasure, and for his as well, though he may not realize it.  I choose to do it while being thankful for him...for the clothes God provides for us, the work that my husband does, the chance to make my home look a little more welcoming, and feel a lot less like an emotional quagmire.  

  HOWEVER...if my boys think they can get away with it....